Thursday, October 07, 2010

A weekend in the asylum

The thug doesn’t know what’s about to hit him.

I don’t know what this scum’s story is. Maybe his dad hit him. Maybe his mommy didn’t love him enough. Maybe he got turned down for dates too often in high school. Maybe he was just born that way. The point is, he’s holding hostages with an automatic weapon. I think we can safely conclude he’s a bad guy.

I slowly, silently lower myself from the gargoyle and wait for him to pass under me. Before he even knows what’s going on, I’m dangling him in mid air by his neck. By the time his fellow thugs hear his screams, I’m long gone. Perched in a corner, hiding in the shadows.

“Where are you?!” they shout. “SHOW YOURSELF!” they cry. A smile spreads across my face. In my gut the creature writhes and snarls and tells me what I need...

I carefully creep around the room, unseen, but waiting to pounce. Their terror filled screams fill the room as they thrash about like bulls in a china shop. They hope to catch a glimpse of me before its too late. Their hope is in vain.

One by one, I pick them off, either pummeling them into unconsciousness when or tying them up like a piñata for their punk friends to find. Finally they’re gone and the hostages are free.

In short, I played a lot of Batman: Arkham Asylum this weekend. I think it was time well spent.

It was tough work, fighting through an army of the Gotham’s worst criminals in Arkham Asylum. But take my word for it, the screams alone are worth it.

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